Spoiler Alert: If you have seen the movie, you may not want to read this review. I haven’t seen the movie but I’ve heard it’s really really good.
At last. The new star trek movie has arrived. I have been eagerly anticipating this event for months. It has been all I could think about day and night. I haven’t groomed. I haven’t bathed. The idea of seeing the crew of star trek one last time before the next sequel has got me all giddy.
I know very little about it other than my brother said it was really good. He’s usually pretty good about that. I still don’t get “Unbreakable”, but otherwise we like pretty much the same movies. “Ooh, I’m made of glass and you’re afraid of water! Ooh.” Whatever. Stupid movie (Unbreakable).
I’ve seen some commercials for it (Star Trek: Back to the First Generation). It kind of looks like “Starship Troopers” or something. I hope it’s as good as that movie! I think Leonard Nimoy is in the new movie. Wow. That doesn’t seem pathetic at all. Maybe he’s in it kind of like the way Paul “Michael” Glazer and David Soul were in the “Starsky and Hutch” movie. I bet William Shatner is in it too. Probably, the new Kirk wrecks the enterprise chasing down a bad alien or something and the new Spock buys the original Enterprise from the old Kirk - reluctant to give up the keys.
Yeah, that’s probably what happens. Then Probably Old Kirk and New Kirk sit out on the balcony, smoking Cigars, bragging about conquests or asking each other’s permission to bang some chick or something.
Warning: The following is what I know about the plot from the commercials and the way I remember stuff people said about it. And probably some stand up comedy routines from decades ago.
So the story begins introducing us to an ornery little Jimmy Kirk in the sleepy little town of Ottumwa, Iowa. It is clear early on that he’s got a taste for adventure. Constantly getting into Mr. Wilson’s flower bed and tracking mud on his mother’s nice clean kitchen floor. He’s incorrigible!
We also get to see Spocky. A four year old half/Vulcan child. He struggles internally with being different than the others. Oh big shock there. I struggle internally with thinking that humans and Vulcans have compatible DNA. There’s probably some explanation in some book somewhere, but it’s not all that interesting to me.
It is in high school at a Halloween party, that we find out Captain (Of the football team) James T. Kirk has a thing for green chicks. He meets a hot green chick (thinking she’s dressed up for Halloween). Next, we see classic Jim, strapping his boots back on. That’s when he realizes this girl really is green and boom, off come the boots!
The movie is well written. The characters are directed to be a sort of tribute to the originals. And that guy from "Shaun of the Dead" plays Scotty. Well that’s about all I know about it. That makes me want to go see it. Or at least wait for Blu-Ray (which was my nickname in college).
4 comments:
Of course I saw it on opening weekend and yes, that's exactly how it went. A truly life changing movie. I have not been so moved by a cinematic showing since "The Happening."
See you had to go and do it. I'm now wondering if my brother loved The Happening, too. Ooh, the trees are trying to kill us! Ooh they stopped trying to kill us. Except in Paris. Ooh, I see dead people.
The End ... ?
And oh yeah, I forgot. Say hello to your mother for me, alright?
Shirly, I can do that.
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