Breakfast Cereals

When I was a kid my favorite was Fruit Brute.  Mostly because he was kind of the bastard stepchild second fiddle character.  He was the underdog, although I think technically he was a werewolf.  The first of the “Monster” themed breakfast cereals I remember was FrankenBerry.  I don’t know if Count Chocula came out before or after (or at the same time as) Frankenberry.  Boo Berry?  Some stupid little tired looking ghost?  No thanks. 

All of these cereals (and Lucky Charms) had one thing in common.  Marshmallows.  Delicious little marshmallows.  Only thing was, they were not delicious straight from the box.  They needed to be steeped in milk for a while.  Oh and by the way, milk used to be white.  Now, for some reason it’s the same color as 10 year old briefs (My college nickname).  I know.  Whole Milk is still white.  I’ve only seen the gray stuff for years though.

So whenever we got one of these marshmallow cereals, we had to eat all the non-marshmallow parts first.  It starts out easily enough, but toward the end, the marshmallows begin to organize, devising schemes to get eaten before all the other bits are gone.  Their favorite trick was clinging to the bottom of the spoon.  As you innocently went to stick 4 grain based nuggets into your mouth, these brazen stowaways would detach from the spoon at the exact moment you were beginning to chomp down.  Sometimes, your tongue would send the alert in time for you to spit the offenders back into the bowl, but usually there was nothing you could do.  A few of us adopted the technique of eating off the top part of the spoon without ever getting the underside in our mouths.

Depending on how careful you were, you could have a very impressive looking pile of milky marshmallows by the time all the meal was gone.  Hang on to that bowl.  If Mom sees all that pure sugar sitting there, she’s going to try to dump it. 

Later on, there was a cereal that I don’t remember much about.  I just remember that it was my favorite.  It was called something like “The Freakies.”  There were several warty colorful characters.  I think I identified with the yellow one.  But I only remember the leader, Boss Moss.  Ok that’s the extent of my recall.  Now to use the internet (Wikipedia) to complete the memory …

The Freakies were made up of seven creatures named Hamhose, Gargle, Cowmumble, Grumble, Goody-Goody, Snorkeldorf and the leader BossMoss. In the mythology of the Freakies, the seven went in search of the legendary Freakies Tree which grew the Freakies cereal. They found the Tree, realized the legend was true, and promptly took up residence in the Tree which then became the backdrop for all the TV spots and package back stories. In 1987, a new Freakies cereal was made, depicting the characters as aliens from another planet. Boss Moss and Grumble were still the same, but the other characters were replaced by new ones, named Hugger, Sweetie, Tooter and Hotdog.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eP8mbxZBl3k

Yeah, it was the yellow one.  Hamhose.  That’s right.  He was always kind of embarrassed by his flamboyant friends, so.

So in conclusion, I saw Munson riding during the Wednesday Night Worlds.  See what I did there?  I was riding.  So was Munson.  The Wednesday Night Worlds were going full bore miles and miles away from where I saw Munson. 

Here’s the cool part.  I was on my way back from what I was estimating as a very hard workout.  Into a slight breeze.  I was going hard.  For me, anything over 150 BPM is hard.  162 is the highest I’ve seen this year.  So I see these 2 douchy racer cyclist types heading south near Culver’s.  As they approach, I notice one looks exactly like Munson with long hair.  Then I’m all “Munson!”  But either he didn’t hear me because of all the hair, or he was ignoring me cause he and whoever was pulling him were flying pretty good. 

I stopped and watched them for a while trying to decide if I was feeling froggy enough to chase them down.  My legs were already very tired.  What the hell.  So I’m going as hard as I possibly can, trying to conserve with a good spin (thanks rollers) and push at intervals.  They are about 300 yards away.  Then they get on the bridge that leads to the big papio trail.  A little out of my way.  Hmm.  Turn around and go home?  Naah.  So I chase and get to about 50 yards from them when I look down and see that my heart rate is at 170.   Then psychology kicked in.  I can’t do this.  They are going too fast.  My heart rate is … Shut up psychology.  Take That!  I stepped on it until I was able to attach to Mike’s wheel.  He hadn’t pulled once this whole time.  So while I’m resting, leader guy turns and sees he has a pesky little marshmallow like stowaway at the bottom of his time trialing spoon.  He kicks it up a notch.  Sorry pal, I’m on now and btw, I just chased you down, so. 

Hey wait a minute, I’m not sure that’s Munson. Those golden locks flowing out the back of his helmet don’t look red enough.  Well rest time’s over, let’s see if I can drop these fags.  As I get into the passing lane … “Munson! It is you.”

“Yeah,” and I swear he said this, “I thought that was either you or Bryan.” 

2 things about this statement.  First, when Munson goes in to get new glasses, he just jacks his thumb toward Mystery Incorporated’s Velma and shouts, “I’ll have what she’s having!”  (I’m saying he has bad eyesight).  Secondly, I need to gain some weight (I’m saying I don’t want to be as skinny as Bryan). 

What a happy reunion.  I guess Randell and Munson are going to take some time off next week for some rides.  I may join them because as Munson said, “It would be nice to get the band back together.”  I’ve suggested we all show up at U.P. on Thursday for the Taco Ride.  That way, maybe we could see Shim.