Lincoln -- The University of Nebraska has named John Osbourne as its Head Football Coach. Interim Husker Athletic Director Tom Osborne made the announcement on Thursday morning, after introducing Osbourne to the team.
Osbourne, known to his friends and fans as simply “Ozzy” is a former “Heavy Metal” musician. Osborne explained his decision to hire Osbourne, “He brings a traditional sounding last name to the program along with a bat-biting intensity that this university has been missing for quite some time.”
Critics of the move say that Osbourne, a foreigner, cannot represent Nebraska football. “Isn’t he British or something?” one fan asked. Many feel that even though Osbourne does “rock”, his lack of coaching experience may hinder his ability to have a positive impact on the program. "Not so," says Dan Cook, longtime NU booster, "Ozzy rocks. Period."
Osbourne’s candidacy for the position came about after Nebraska alumnus, Tommy Lee turned down an offer to lead the team back to prominence. “Have you heard about these breakfasts they have? They’re like in the fucking morning and shit! No way,” explained Dr. Lee.
7 comments:
fuckin' ..go ... catch ... the tackles .... uh... bloody ... Sharon!
I bet the mavs could beat the huskers
Whatever, Brady. The huskers would so kill the Mavs. It would be cool to see that matchup happen just to shut you people up. Or were you talking about football? Sorry, I thought you were saying the Mavs Volleyball team could beat the Huskers. My bad.
Bryan - I know it sounds like gibberish, but that's actually a play straight out of Osbourne's vaunted "Crazy Train" offense.
RIP, Randy Rhodes.
I'd be willing to bet the Mavs couldn't beat the Huskers in anything. Not even hockey.
forensics
This is the funniest, most entertaining post I have read on a blog ever, thats any blog in the whole blogging world! You know my cousins husband played for TO and actually wore a headband with OZZY written on it to press day one year. That wasn't as funny as this though. Hey I say they give Ozzy a shot, he's more sober than Solich.
Brady - Yeah, the crazy thing is a couple of years ago, Pederson tried to lure coach Syrek away from UNO. I'm glad she didn't bite. UNO RULZ!!! You can bet a lot of these kids will be doing forensics work on Sunday next year.
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Thanks Shim.
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