2 Broke Girls Fan Fiction

"So there's these 2 girls.  They're broke.  It might be because they are trying to do a sitcom.  But anyway, the story as I understand it is that there's this one who is brunette and she has been brought up 'school of hard knocks' style.  Then there's a blonde who grew up rich but her dad was a criminal or something.

"Then they had to both get jobs as waitresses with the MILF (but not anymore) and Garrett Morris," said some pitch man.

The rest is history.  Or as they might say on the hit television series '2 Broke Girls,' "Herstory!"

So here's the rough draft of the fan fiction I'm going to send in to the producers of  '2 broke girls.'  I hope they use at least some of my ideas.  because they are hilarious!

I don't know their names on the show, So I'm going to call the blonde one "Blondie" and the Brunette one "Shithead"

"Ok, it's coming,"  shouted Shithead to a griping customer.  It was always the same with these extras.  While she was busy trying to come up with snappy one-liners, her tables were bitching again.

"Dyn-o-mite!"  said Garett Morris.

"Hnaw Hnaw" said the horny MILF (not so much anymore).

Then there was like this Russian cook or owner or something.  He came out from the kitchen and said to the ex-MILF, "My love for you is ticking clock.  Berserker!"

While all of the hilarity was ensuing, Travis Bickle walked in to the diner and sat at a booth in the back.  He had the whole mohawk and army jacket thing going on.

"I call him," said shithead.

"You take him. He looks like a nutcase!" said Blondie.

Shithead couldn't believe her luck. Sure, he looked a little crazy, but she liked it that way.  She knew she could charm this loser.

"Whadya have handsome?" she asked Bickle.

"You talkin' to me, shitheel?" DeNiro said.

"Shithead, actually," corrected Shithead.

"Well your dead now, bitch!"

Shithead turned to Blondie to deliver the hilarious line, "On second thought, he's all yours."  She was walking back to the counter when Travis Bickle approached her from behind and a single shot rang out. The people at the counter watched in horror as the pool of crimson spread across the front of Shithead's golden nylon uniform.

Shithead dropped to the floor.  Because she was dead.

There was a mass panic as extras took cover from the madman.

Travis Bickle calmly stepped over the body, walked to the front and slapped a quarter onto the counter.

"For the mess," he explained and walked out of the diner and into the street.

To anyone watching from outside, Travis looked just like a 1970's version of Robert DeNiro.  He shot a wry smile at an aging Cybill Shepherd.  She was wearing that same old red dress.  "Hey Betsy," he said as he raised his hand and pressed a button on a handheld remote of some kind.

When the diner exploded into a million billion pieces killing not only everyone inside who remained alive, but also all of the cast and crew and writers and cameramen and people who called in sick that day, Travis couldn't have looked more pleased.

"My hero!" exclaimed Betsy, hair blown back from the blast.  Travis took her in his arms and they lived happily ever after.


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This Post FAQ

Q: So Cube - is this some sort of analogy or anagram or something for life?    

A: No.  It is not.  It's really about starting a new job.

Q: We don't get it.

A:  That's not a question.

Q: Did you really hate your old job that much?

A:  Excellent frequently asked question.  I hated it as much as anyone could ever hate a job.  But no.  Not as much as I hate the hit comedy TV series "2 Broke Girls"

Q:  Aren't you being a little ...

A:  No more questions.